Day 5 passed, the three months to make any missing modifications to the wheelchair were up and no appointment to fix the footrest. Three months. 90 days. 90 days have passed, and now I'm the only one who's losing out. They haven't fitted a new battery either, and I've basically had the wheelchair modified to no avail, as I can't get out of bed. Yesterday - on the 7th, I'm writing this at 3.11am on the 9th - I went to get my hair cut and felt more pain than usual.

Every day I'm more tempted to give in to my alcoholic tendencies, which would be impossible because no one would let me drink too much. I wanted to write a more positive post this time, but so far I can't hide my feelings, I have to talk about my frustrations and everything else here, it's a personal blog after all. I'm just tired, really. I've been completely melancholy for two days now, holding back the urge to cry.

The third session with the psychologist was great, we talked a lot. I'm going to start getting up more, what's really stopping me is having everything on the internet, socialising and everything else. Yes, on the internet I can forget everything and be and do whatever I want. Outside, what do I do? Am I staring at something? Do I feel pain? No, thanks, I'd rather stay in bed where there's Internet. But there's another problem: I'm tired of being chronically online, I just can't take it anymore.